Skill 25-1
If you do not have someone to talk to
Research shows that social isolation dramatically increases stress and risk. We cannot learn about ourselves and how we manage emotions like anger alone. We have to have a listener to help us think through our experience and enable us to make discoveries that we could never achieve on our own.

If you have no one to fill this role, then you must take the initiative to reach out to potential listeners. Look around. Consider neighbors, colleagues at work, relatives, others in your church or civic group. If you don't belong to a church or civic group, consider joining one.

Call this person or take them aside for a personal discussion. You could begin by saying, "I have a personal problem I need to think through. Can you talk for a few moments?" You are looking for someone who will be touched by such a request and would have some enthusiasm for listening and solving problems. Not everyone can be a good listener. You will be surprised, though, by the number of decent, kind people who will give you their full attention because they want to really help. You just have to find those folks.

When you do, be sure to develop your own talents for being a good listener (a future course at the WonderWise Parent perhaps) and give back what you have graciously received.

Next: Skill 26: Lower my anger action point