Spectrum of Violence
via 11th Principle Consent (https://www.11thprincipleconsent.org/)
For its Uniform Crime Reports, the FBI defines rape as: “Penetration, no matter how slight, of the vagina or anus with any body part or object, or oral penetration by a sex organ of another person, without the consent of the victim."
Sexual assault is a term used to describe many gendered and sexualized crimes. Those definitions that vary from state to state. Kansas crimes statutes and their definitions can be found here.
Elements of consensual sexual activity include:
- Both partners are old enough to consent
- Both people have the capacity to consent; neither partner is incapacitated or unconscious
- Consent was freely given (without coercion or manipulation) and can be retracted at any point in time
- Consent is an on-going process
- Consent can be communicated verbally and non-verbally
- Consent cannot be inferred by previous consensual acts
- Consent cannot be inferred by the absence of a “no”
As a survivor of sexual violence, you have options and rights.
Intimate Partner Violence
Dating violence is controlling, abusive, and aggressive behavior in a romantic relationship. It can happen in straight or gay relationships. It can include verbal, emotional, physical, or sexual abuse, or a combination.*
Domestic violence is a pattern of abusive and coercive behavior used to gain dominance, power, and control over an intimate partner. It includes the use of illegal and legal behaviors and tactics that undermine the victim’s sense of self, free will, and safety. Domestic violence is often used, in contrast to dating violence, when the intimate partners are living together or have children in common.
While legal definitions of stalking vary from one jurisdiction to another, a good working definition of stalking is a course of conduct directed at a specific person that would cause a reasonable person to feel fear. Stalking is serious, often violent, and can escalate over time. You are not to blame for a stalker’s behavior.
Some things stalkers do:
- Follow you and show up wherever you are
- Send unwanted gifts, letters, cards, or e-mails
- Damage your home, car, or other property
- Monitor your phone calls or computer use
- Use technology, like hidden cameras or global positioning systems (GPS), to track where you go
- Drive by or hang out at your home, school, or work
- Threaten to hurt you, your family, friends, or pets
- Find out about you by using public records or online search services, hiring investigators, going through your garbage, or contacting friends, family, neighbors, or co-workers
- Posting information or spreading rumors about you on the Internet, in a public place, or by word of mouth
- Other actions that control, track, or frighten you
Creating a safety plan for stalking is an important step in evaluating your options and level of risk. A Stalking Incident and Behavior Log (pdf) may help you to document any and all times that you felt threatened or fearful because of the behaviors of the individual(s) who is stalking you.
(via Stalking Resource Center)
Sexual harassment involves unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature in which submission to or rejection of such conduct explicitly or implicitly affects an individual's work or school performance or creates an intimidating, hostile, or offensive environment.
Types of Sexual Harassment
- Quid pro quo: when the perpetrator makes anything (getting a raise, obtaining housing, getting an certain grade in a course) contingent upon the victim providing sexual favors
- Hostile environment: when unwelcome and persistent sexual conduct creates an uncomfortable and hostile environment for the victim