We can have different feelings simultaneously
Emotions are difficult to understand because we can have several feelings at the same time. For example, a father waiting at 2:30 a.m. for his sixteen-year-old daughter to return from a date is likely to feel both frightened and angry. One moment he is furiously pacing the hall, the next, frantically looking out the living room window. Feelings can be confusing when they seem to contradict each other. Beneath the anger and fear, he feels deep love and concern. Which emotion will he express—anger or love—when his daughter walks through their front door?

A man whose wife is dying from a long ordeal with cancer may feel deep grief with a trace of relief following her death. He might also be angry with himself for feeling this relief. Such feelings can become jumbled and confusing, sometimes in contradictory ways. They can be difficult to sort.