❖ Understanding anger means being aware of its source
Not only does anger sometimes disguise other emotions, anger sometimes disguises its own source. What seems to be "making" us angry is not the real original trigger of our anger. The real threat trigger is hidden.
For example, our child does something minor to irritate us. We go ballistic, screaming and yelling. The emotion is way out of proportion to the misbehavior of the child. Something else is the real fuel for the anger. Maybe it was that boss who piled the work on our desks that afternoon and made unreasonable demands on us.
Because anger is probably a difficult (if not risky) emotion to reveal to a boss, it's much easier to express the anger to a much safer target, a child for instance.
Understanding anger means being aware of its source.
Next: Principle 9: We all have different anger set points