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K-state professor studies how children make sense of war; gives suggestions on talking to children about the threat By Jessica Clark and Michelle Hall
In the past two years, terrorist attacks on United States soil, child abductions across the nation, a sniper randomly targeting victims and -- most recently -- war involving America have given parents plenty to try to explain to their perhaps scared and confused children.
Myers-Bowman, whose expertise is in family life education, recommends parents begin discussions on the issue of war with their children by asking them questions, or watching the news or reading the paper together. "The parents can then find out what the child is thinking, what the child knows or does not know and what the child may be afraid of," she said. Then, the parent can decide what to do next. However, there is no formula for how the discussion should go, Myers-Bowman warned. It will be different for every child and parent. But by feeling out what the child is thinking and feeling, parents should be able figure out where to go with the conversation, she said. Myers-Bowman's suggestions on discussing war with children are aided by research she is presently conducting. She recently received a grant for the study "Parents, Children, War and Peace in the Wake of September 11th." "We aren't examining the trauma or effects of war on children, but rather how they comprehend and make sense of it," Myers-Bowman said of her research. Children from the ages of three to 18 are included and parents are also invited to participate, either by filling out questionnaires or through interviews. Children are asked questions to see what they know about war and peace, how they have learned that information and what they think should be done about war and peace. Parents are asked what things they've talked about with their children, among other issues related to war and peace. What they've discovered is that children know more about these topics than parents think they know. "We would love for our children to not have to deal with these things, but that is not a choice we can make," Myers-Bowman said. "Children are exposed to these topics -- they hear it on the news, from their friends, they learn about it in school. Even kids three to four years old know what war is." Through this research, Myers-Bowman and her colleagues provide parents with suggestions on how to deal with difficult discussions, such as the topic of war. Judith Myers-Walls, an associate professor and extension specialist from Purdue, also is involved in the research, along with Kathy Walker, an assistant professor in family studies and an art therapist from Kent State who interprets drawings and artwork produced by children in the interview process. Doctoral students Jeanne Lash and Liang-Yu Deng are gathering information and using the study as the basis for their dissertations. Lash will focus on gathering information from adolescents and Deng will be gathering information from Asian families in the Manhattan area. Summer 2003 |
Karen
Myers-Bowman, an assistant professor of family studies and human services
at Kansas State University, said it is very important for parents to help
children think about these difficult issues. She recommends parents and
children talk about their own values to help children think about what
is happening in our world. Also, children often have perceptions of events
and resulting fears that are irrational, Myers-Bowman warned. For example,
on Sept. 11, 2001, children in Manhattan, Kan., heard about the attacks
in Manhattan, N.Y., and perceived the events were occurring in their hometown.
Parent/child talks also can help parents discover and alleviate their
children's irrational fears.