You get to choose your own way
Making a choice means being conscious of the pull of the current and making a deliberate decision to act differently. If my stepfather never hugged me, I can choose to hug my children. If he used sarcasm in his childrearing, I can choose to abandon that treatment to be more caring in my own relationships. As I do so, I also leave behind the excuse of “I can’t help it because that’s how I was raised.”
If we were fortunate to have wonderful fathers and mothers, we have models to strive for. A high standard can be challenging as well. We are different from our parents. Ultimately, we have to find our own way regardless of how we were raised.
Finding our own way is difficult if we never experienced what we want to do.
The key issue here is, “Do I have the strength to make my own choices?”
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Journal 3 Recreating myself
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